When we have grown up with few boundaries and been taught that boundaries are selfish, it can be challenging to put them in place as an adult.
It can be challenging to know what is appropriate, what you need, and most of all, it can feel terrifying relationally.
If your experience is of being rejected, punished or ridiculed for putting in place boundaries that protect you, it makes sense that just the thought of putting boundaries in place is scary.
It can take a while to embody the knowing that boundaries are a form of love. They are a form of self-love, and in the end, they are often a form of relational love. Not all boundaries push people away.
Healthy boundaries have the potential to improve a relationship in unexpected ways.
If you have struggled with boundaries, especially with your family, let me know in the comments.