The Legacy of a Grandmother

Energy flows through lineages. The good, the bad and the ugly. 

It is passed down through our nervous systems, DNA and behaviours our parents learnt, and their parents learnt. How old are the scripts that I was raised with? They probably stretch back hundreds of years.

This is my maternal grandmother, Joyce. I remember that she kept little sachets of lavender and bundles of scented soap in her clothes drawers, so she always smelt of lavender and soap. 

She loved her garden; she grew rhubarb that we would cut and dip in bowls of sugar, the sweet and sour taste blending like sherbet. 

What came through this maternal line for me? 

  • A sense of God and of being loved by something greater than myself
  • A connection with the role of ‘mother’ as a warm, soft, supportive place
  • A feeling that men were a bit useless
  • A feeling that money was to be hidden away from the men
  • A deep understanding, communion and appreciation of nature and confidence in my ability to grow things
  • A sense that education was not very important
  • A sense that money had little real meaning or value
  • A feeling that women weren’t expected to be incredibly happy in their marriage
  • A sense of safety in the family unit, but not in the extended community outside
  • Having a good job keeps you safe

I am grateful for her presence in my life growing up. We saw her once a week, and it was the highlight of the week for me. She would come with Jammy Dodgers, chocolate Bourbons, and sometimes jam doughnuts (the old ones covered in thick granulated sugar).

As an adult, I am now aware of the mixed bag I inherited. 

I wonder what energy, thoughts and beliefs came through your maternal line when you think about your grandmother?