It is normal to have mixed feelings about people we are in a relationship with. When we are in black and white thinking, it might be challenging to accept that we have different feelings about the same person. When we …
Tag: Emotions
5 Proven BENEFITS of Crying
For all the times you have cried and shamed yourself! Here is some permission. Crying is a natural response to many situations. It relieves stress, it effectively self-soothes and brings the parasympathetic nervous system online. It releases oxytocin and endorphins, …
How We Meet On Each Level, If At All
If you read through this list and know that energy is lacking in one of these areas in your relationship, I wonder how that area could be energised in some way? How could you meet in that area differently? What …
How Do We Meet Our Fear?
The first time I remember feeling fear I was about 4 years old. I was being dragged up the stairs of our home as punishment for something I don’t remember. I remember feeling numb. My whole body felt like it …
Do I Feel Too Much?
We all have a story surrounding our relationship with feelings. We might have learnt that feelings are dangerous if we grew up with dysregulated parents or that feelings are shameful if we grew up with parents who were disconnected from …
Acting Out
When you feel yourself about to ‘act out’ can you pause? Can you hold the tension and discomfort in your body and be curious about what is happening for you. Can you think, “wow! I am feeling so much anger …
What is the inner child?
Children are naturally creative. They have to be creative to survive in the world and learn about the world. They hear a new noise and want to find out what it is. They see something new and want to explore …
My Partner Always Wants To Pause During Difficult Conversations, And It Is Difficult To Move Forward
The curiosity here is around reactivity, and when fight, flight or freeze might take over for either of you in the relationship. This is a conversation that needs to happen when you are NOT in the middle of an argument. …
When To Take A Break During A Difficult Conversation:
According to the Gottman’s, 69% of relationship arguments are unsolvable, so it no surprise that they can cause so much frustration. Have you ever been in a situation where you are both feeling unheard, misunderstood and you are both starting …
Communicating Needs Without Losing it.
When we ask for something, we risk being and feeling rejected. We are vulnerable. To cover that vulnerability, many of us will use anger or force. How can I ask for what I need and hold onto the part of …