Healing old communication styles where we play games, push our partner away and DON’T get what we want.
Here are some situations, some old communication styles, that don’t work, and some new ways to communicate to help get your needs met.
I hope you find them helpful!
SITUATION – When you talk to him, he is not really listening. It makes you feel disrespected and unimportant
GAME PLAYING – You stop mid-sentence and storm off, expecting him to come after you and apologise.
CLEAR COMMUNICATION – Sharing that you value his input in your life and sharing your thoughts and experiences with him, “Would you be willing to put your phone down for 5 minutes and hear me?”
SITUATION – He hasn’t made contact in a few days and you feel worried about the relationship.
GAME PLAYING – Tell him you have been out with an ex (that will show him!)
CLEAR COMMUNICATION – “When you don’t contact me for a few days I start to feel nervous because I value our relationship. Would you be willing to let me know when you won’t be able to contact me for a few days?”
SITUATION – You find out through social media that your partner was out on Saturday night without you and you feel rejected.
GAME PLAYING – You post pictures of yourself with hot guys all over social media and don’t answer his calls.
CLEAR COMMUNICATION – “When you don’t let me know what you are doing on the weekend, I feel disappointed and agitated, because I need a sense of safety in our relationship. I’m wondering if in the future you would be able to let me know what you are up to on the weekend, even if they are last minute plans?”
Learning to communicate clearly and break the habit of game playing, is a total game changer. It allows us to get clear and be clear with our needs and will quickly let us know if we are in the right relationship or not.