As a therapist and healer raising children I am often asked for hints and tips on raising children. Like everyone else, I am learning as I go, and do not profess to be the perfect parent (if such a thing exists), I try my best. And sometimes it is just trial and error. I don’t think anyone can prepare us for the journey of parenthood, and what is wonderful for one child is a disaster for another.
Start at the beginning.
I raise my children with the premise that they are wise people, intelligent and worthy of opinions, thoughts and feelings.
I take the view that my role as a parent is to provide a loving environment, with appropriate boundaries, where they can grow into functional adults.
Think of a sapling growing in a forest. It needs sun and rain, and sometimes it grows a bit too much to the left, so as parents we put the sun on the right, to help it keep going up, growing straight. Then it grows too much to the right and we adjust again.
This principle is one of the foundations for my relationship with my children, and I contemplate it regularly.