When you feel yourself about to ‘act out’ can you pause? Can you hold the tension and discomfort in your body and be curious about what is happening for you. Can you think, “wow! I am feeling so much anger …
Category: Wellness
The Difference Between A One-Off Trauma and Complex Trauma.
There is a huge difference between a one-off, shock trauma and complex trauma. In this panel interview, I explain the differences using a personal experience with shock trauma. This panel interview was one of a three-part series exploring trauma for …
The Healing Journey
There is a cycle we all go through while we are healing. It is the cycle of discovery, healing and then growth. As we discover, it can be confronting. It can be confronting to watch yourself push your partner away …
Signs I Am Healing In My Relationships
Ram Dass says that relationships are one of the most challenging forms of yoga. When he says this, he is talking about the way you meet in an intimate relationship. You will see all of the parts of self when …
Are You a Cycle Breaker?
As a cycle breaker, it is common to get push back. Push back sounds like this: Do you think you are better than us? Why are you making such a fuss? You are so over-sensitive. Why do you always have …
The Dance Of The Avoidant & The Anxiously Attached
If you think of every adult as having a child-like part and an adult-like part, certain combinations are very attractive. For example, an adult with a well-developed adult part, let’s say he’s a banker. Quite serious, not much fun. He …
How To Be With A Partner Who Has Disorganised Attachment
Children are wired for survival. To survive, they will adapt to their environment to get their needs for food, love, and security met. In children who show disorganised attachment, the primary caregiver has been erratic, unpredictable and sometimes abusive and …
Where is Your Energy Going?
At some point, many of us will find ourselves contemplating what is meaningful. What is life about for me? My time here is limited, so what would a meaningful life look like for me? Here are some things to ponder …
Disorganised Attachment
This attachment style is a combination of the previous two (avoidant and ambivalent/anxious). Disorganised children give inconsistent responses in the presence of their primary caregiver (often the mother). They seem disoriented and confused. This is likely the result of erratic …
How to Get to Self-Love
I remember when I first heard about the concept of self-love. It was totally foreign. What did it mean to love yourself? I had only ever been taught that it was good to love others, to be kind to others. …